Showing posts with label philosophical musings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label philosophical musings. Show all posts

Thursday, May 10, 2018

The nature and futility of conservatism



Most people tend to find the era in which they live--not necessarily the one in which they came of age but the one in which they raise children, or at least are of child-bearing age--to be 'the scariest time in human history.' Given the alarming frequency of mass shootings, the improbable resurgence of what is euphemistically called "white nationalism," and the fact that our president gets in Twitter wars with world leaders of nuclear capable foreign powers, it appears the current era is no different. People are afraid, and believe they should be uniquely afraid given the fact that they perceive this era's dangers to far surpass that of any other time in human or at the very least recent history.

But while the inclination can be tempting, we should be careful waxing poetic about the 'simpler' dangers of previous eras. I personally do not believe we are living in a time of unprecedented danger, at least no more or less so than just about any other generation. I would not rather live in a pre-antibiotic world, where a scrape could kill me. I do not long for the days when women were subjugated to household slavery and treated as chattel. I do not harken back to a time when brown people, more so than being shot by police or imprisoned for minor offenses, were chased through the streets and lynched by angry mobs as entertainment. Nor do I mean to imply that our current era is one which has vastly improved from the times referenced heretofore. Certainly we are, or very nearly could be entering a new, terrifying post-antibiotic era where the medicines we have come to depend on for keeping our bodies staph free or washing our hands, or disinfecting our mouths are all going to cease working. Women are still fighting for equal pay in the best cases, and in the worst cases are still treated as slaves and chattel. Brown people's bodies are still at risk of a policeman's bullet or a hangman's noose.

As the decades and millennia pass by, each time period seems to trade one "scary thing" for another, the net effect of which is sometimes impossible to quantify as being worse or better than previous or future "scary things." While progress has undeniably been made in some matters, it has been slow or even slipped backwards in others. The phrase, 'If it's not one thing, it's another' seems to fit here. If nothing else, humans have proven themselves particularly talented at perpetuating and manufacturing strife, danger, and suffering.

So the question becomes, how do we look forward to a future that will surely bring along its own set of as-yet-unknowable terrors? How do we pretend to be satisfied with 'progress,' be it social, economic, medical, technological, or political, when the modern era has proven itself to contain its own unique set of dangers, atrocities, and seemingly insurmountable obstacles? I don't know how to answer this, and I suppose this feeling, this knowledge that atrocities replace other atrocities, fears replace other fears, and one type of suffering replaces another is what makes it difficult to "look on the bright side" or "celebrate progress." Does progress as we tend to think of it really exist or are we just running along an endless hamster wheel of death, destruction, and unfathomable suffering?

And yet, another peculiar thing about humans is that somehow we do generally look on the bright side. We remain optimistic enough to continue working at our jobs, raising our families, caring for aging parents. In our darkest moments we may feel like screaming into stranger's faces and collapsing into ourselves, but for the most part, the human mind tends to wrench sense and order from the most nonsensical and disordered scenarios. And however improbably, this instinct does indeed coexist with a rosy-hued fondness for the past. For a time when 'kids could play outside' or 'traffic wasn't so bad' or 'families were stronger' and 'people knew the value of hard work.' And of course, politically this fondness for a less scary, more wholesome past is known as conservatism, a political stance as bewildering and illogical as it is predictable given humankind's stubborn adherence to fairytale, folklore, and familiarity. Conservatism is a dangerous form of make-believe wherein the believer sees the past as one might see a dead child--wholly innocent, luminous, free from corruption and malice and something to be propped up for all to see as a bastion of human integrity. The attendant quirks that tend to go along with conservatism--deeply held religious beliefs, xenophobia, an allergy to government funded safety nets, are but accessories in the core belief that at all possible costs, you must restore the country/your town/your family/the world to the past. Thus, conservatism is a fool's errand, if you consider that from the grandest to the most microscopic level of material existence, the only thing constant is change.









Sunday, January 29, 2017

Things to do when you fear the impending demise of our Democracy



So...it's been an interesting past several months. Among the many, many bad things that have happened in the world, I am still living with my parents, I turned 34, and there's been some unwelcome death and sickness in my family. Which is all part of life, really, and for the most part I've been able to self-soothe so that the aforementioned setbacks don't totally derail my happiness (that's what 15 years of therapy will do for you...I'm practically a psychopharmacologist!!) but the one worry/fear that I cannot soothe away no matter what drugs I take or how many downward dogs I do is the fear that there's an evil orange man who has just been elected to the most powerful position on the planet, and that even if he somehow dies or get himself impeached, the one waiting in the wings to take his place is on a radical jesus crusade that may somehow be even more terrifying than being at the mercy of a legit autocrat with narcissistic personality disorder.

What are we to do? I post on Facebook incessantly. I keep track of all the fucked up shit that's been happening. I sign petitions, write letters to the White House, deleted my Uber app (which may or may not be helpful). But the fact remains that I firmly believe we are entering an era of unprecedented danger, that our country is being helmed by a madman, and, perhaps most worryingly, that there are hordes of Americans who believe my fears are unfounded and that the danger we face is exaggerated or manufactured by a bunch of sore losers. Never mind the fact that historians and political scientists could provide reams of evidence comparing our current state to what has happened in Venezuela, China, Russia, and yes, Germany, but the facts still fall on deaf ears. For anyone experiencing the same fears/impotent rage/frustration as me, I've compiled a list of things you can do besides scream into the abyss (or in addition to screaming into the abyss, because sometimes that just feels good).

1. Contact your member of congress
There are two approaches to this. If you live in an area where your MoC hasn't taken a stance against Trump and his policies, call his or her office to voice your displeasure. Attend town hall meetings with as many friends as you can organize (starting a Facebook group is a good idea). The important thing to remember is that MoCs are uniquely susceptible to changing their tune if they sense a sea change within their constituency because they're up for reelection every 2 years. So they're basically always in campaign mode. Remember, if enough people reach out to them personally, they will be incentivized to listen, or ignore at their own peril.

If you happen to live in an area where your MoC has already spoken out against Trump, lucky you. Consider taking the same actions as above, but letting them know that you are behind them and appreciate their dedication to fighting the Trump agenda. As you can imagine, they don't often receive kudos from happy citizens, so your praise will go a long way towards making sure they continue to fight the good fight.

If you don't know who your Representative in Congress is, visit www.callmycongress.com to find out. You can also visit www.govtrack.us to see their individual voting record on key issues.

2. Put your money where your mouth is
Planned Parenthood, the ACLU, The NAACP, and countless other organizations all need monetary help to mount expensive legal battles against the Trump administration. Donating money is actually pretty much the easiest thing you can do. It takes absolutely none of your time.  I don't recommend doing that alone, but if you have the means, do it. Jezebel has an excellent list of organizations that could use financial help here.

3. Volunteer for those organizations
Getting involved on a local level is something that makes a huge difference. Just ask the Tea Party. And listen, if you've thus far focused all of your philanthropic and volunteer time on puppies and kittens, please, I beg of you--spend at least as much time helping the minority groups that are being directly affected by Trumps xenophobic, homophobic, isolationist policies. I get it, dogs are cute but human beings need help too. Oh, here's another idea: if you work for a company that claims to espouse progressive ideals, encourage your HR department to support a work-sponsored day of action.

4. Fucking vote for chrissake. Make it a point to never miss an election, even the small ones. Now we know what can happen if we stay home. This isn't a joke. There are real consequences to our apathy and inaction. If you live in a true blue state (or red for that matter) and think your vote doesn't matter, maybe that's why we should look into supporting electoral reform so that every vote counts. Currently only 11 states have signed the National Popular Vote Interstate Contract, an agreement to award all of a state's votes in the electoral college to the candidate who wins the popular vote. Find out if your state is one of them here, and if it isn't, time to call up your MoC buddy on the phone again.

While the women's march was an uplifting powerful moment, ultimately it won't foment change in the system, and it won't serve as a deterrent to Trump or his policies. Real, lasting change has to come about through the existing systems of government and through broad action to fight Trump policy on a national scale. The time to hesitate is through.




Thursday, June 23, 2016

Leaving San Francisco


I'm sitting in my living room on the threadbare, dirty carpet. There are boxes all around me, the room is strewn with 9 years' worth of personal detritus that I lovingly collect, frame, display, and shove into forgotten drawers. Out of the picture window, framed like a neon light-up poster, are the cotton candy clouds illuminated by a solstice sun that is taking its sweet time slipping behind Twin Peaks. Bernal Hill is to the right, the giant cranes in the Oakland shipyards are directly across the bay, standing like monstrous trojan horses. The neighbor's weird chimney vent that looks like a knight's helmet and shakes its head (gently or vehemently, depending on the strength of the wind) is unmoving, staring just off to the left where the plum tree that reaches its branches against my window is slowly bearing fruit.

I have spent 9 years of my life in this place, in my own place filled with my things, with this view from not the apex, but the near-apex of the hill. A place that makes it difficult getting in and out of your car--the door will keep trying to slam on your calves as you climb out. Visitors nearly always enter the apartment breathless, even if they only parked across the street, their cheeks and lungs flush with new blood.

I have moved from nascent to fully-formed adulthood in this apartment. Age 24 - 33. A time period that took me through 3 jobs, 2 boyfriends, 9 roommates. Roommates that come and go as their lives take them to other cities, other apartments, other jobs. Dean, Julia, Tara, Alicia, Brooke, Lori, Ben, Wardell, Monica. Gone but not forgotten (although I wish I could forget Ben, the roommate who locked himself in his room drinking for 3 months and never bothered to wipe his pee off of the bathroom floor). I hold their presence with me as I pace through the empty rooms, down the narrow hallway. Their DNA must still somehow remain in the lead-based paint and the threadbare carpet.

I want to remember every detail of every thing that ever happened to me within these walls. I want to memorize the floor plan so that 10, 20, 30 years from now, when I am calling somewhere else home, I can still conjure up the details of this, my first apartment. I want to remember every sunset that I watched from the living room, momentarily stopping whatever I was doing (or more likely, watching) to take in the vibrant colors and expansive mural of the city. I want to remember conversations had and un-had, parties thrown, lazy evenings spent in total and complete relaxation. I want to remember the guy who walks his cat on a leash and is maddeningly un-humorous about it.

I am sentimental and to forget is anathema.

But change is inevitable, and whatever comes with this new chapter of my life, my non-San Francisco chapter (working title) will surely bring with it new things to be wistful and wax poetic about, so I really shouldn't be standing in what was the spare bedroom getting all misty-eyed. It's not like I have nowhere to go. I won't be homeless. I'll just be transient for a time, without a home of my own but not without a roof over my head.

And what is home anyway? How much does it really matter, to have a place filled with your shit that you return to at the end of the day and feel comfortable in? A place where the DVR is filled with your recordings, where the coffee grinder is right where you left it. Where time unfurls with an ease and predictability as comforting as pulling a warm fleece blanket around your shoulders when the June gloom sets in and the wind comes howling out of the west and sweeping down the hill. A place where you can walk around in your underwear and be ugly as you please.

All this is a roundabout way of admitting that I'm moving in with my parents for a time while I sort through the cognitive dissonance associated with being a textbook gentrifier who can't afford the city she helped gentrify. OH THE IRONY. I will miss this place.

Stay tuned for more adventures.


Friday, January 1, 2016

Why Does Time Fly?



If 2015 felt like the fastest year yet, welcome to the club. And if you need more reasons to fear the speed of your impending demise, check out this terrifying infographic by Maximilian Kiener that explains if you live to be 100, half of your perceived life is already over by age 7. 

Happy New Year!

Monday, June 1, 2015

"I'm not doing this to be interesting. I'm doing this to live."

Photo via Vanity Fair

Today is the day we finally meet Caitlyn Jenner (kinda surprised she didn't go for "Kaitlyn" but then again I guess part of this whole transition is to escape the klutches of the Kardashians). She looks radiant, glamorous, confident in her skin. Sure, this photo is probably heavily 'shopped but name one cover photo of a single celebrity between the ages of 6 and 60 that isn't. I've been following this story ever since, well, since Keeping Up with the Kardashians first aired. Yes, I'm one of 'those people' partially responsible for keeping them famous and on the air. I can't defend anything they do from an intellectual standpoint, all I can really say is that my pop culture diet is rich and varied--I like a little bit of junk food just as much as I like a fine dining experience. Part of the appeal is just now inane, how mind-numbingly self absorbed these people are. It's like watching what happens to someone when they absolutely lose all sense of self. A crude experiment. If we were given all that money and fame and paid handsomely to sip frappucinos and ruminate on the merits of laser butt lifts, would we be turn out any better? Maybe not.

But with Caitlyn's transition the story gains a deeper layer--yes these people are ridiculous but they're still people and now they're dealing with something very very real. I can't imagine what it must be like to live every day in the wrong body. And I also can't imagine what it would be like to have a parent transition. It resonates with me very deeply when I hear Khloe say that she feels like Bruce has died. Sure, it's the same person inside, but the person who raised you, who you called "dad" now has the face of a beautiful woman in her 60s. What kind of a mind fuck is that?

To the people who call this a publicity stunt, that's a little bit of a stretch, isn't it? I mean, irreversible gender transition is kind of beyond the pale, even for this family, as a means of securing tabloid space. Regardless of motivation, being open about her transition might even have an altruistic bent. Caitlyn's story is going to help lots of people struggling with similar issues. Hell, it might even save a life or two. And that's no joke.


Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Werner Herzog Inspirationals

Today I'm savoring the bleak, coldly scientific nihilism of Werner Herzog. It's keeping me warm like a cup of hot tea.






All images, captions, and title via: Werner Herzog Inspirationals